Because enquiring minds need to know…
Fabio Lanzoni – the famous romance cover model from the 90′s – was interviewed by Jay Rayner in The Observer last month. Here’s an extract:
There are a whole bunch of striking things to take in on meeting Fabio Lanzoni for the first time: the four huge Rottweilers that are likely to press their faces up against the window of your car as you arrive, a riot of sabre tooth and floppy pink tongue; the 200-odd motorbikes, and the shimmering, penila bonnets of the supercars parked out front of his ranch-style mansion; the hilltop aspect of the house itself.
But none is as mesmerising, as completely awe-inspiring, as Fabio’s tits. I had heard tell of them before, of course, had even studied photographs of them. They are practically on the Californian tourist trail. But nothing prepared me for the thrill of meeting them in person. They are monumental, as if two of the uprights from Stonehenge have been half-inched from the Wiltshire landscape and stuffed down the front of the gym-workout top he is wearing when he bounds down the curving drive to meet me. I swiftly become intrigued by how they move, how they stretch and shift, these two super-powered plates of prime male breast meat.
If he were a woman, of course, this would be a disgraceful admission. You can’t just stare at breasts like this. But with Fabio – like Madonna and Sting he is, to the American public, a man with only a first name – focusing on his chest seems entirely reasonable. Sure, there’s the breeze-block square jaw, and the glossy, sunlit curtain of shiny hair, and the tree-trunk arms. But it is that chest that defines him, that has propelled him through a career as broad as the distance between his nipples (sorry; I’m clearly obsessed). He has been a model, has graced the covers of thousands of romance novels and has even put his name to a few of them. He has run a fashion company, made headlines for scrapping with George Clooney and, famously, once killed a goose with just the bridge of his nose (it flew into him during the maiden voyage of a new rollercoaster he was endorsing. Could have happened to anyone).
But now he has reached a landmark. Fabio, a man entirely defined by his looks, is turning 50 and I’ve come out to his home, deep in the San Fernando Valley north of Los Angeles to find out how he and his pectoral muscles are coping.
To read the whole interview, click here.
Fabio was in the news again a couple of weeks later for spectacularly crashing a borrowed Ferrari 599 GTB Fiorino, reportedly worth over $400,000. Following the April 12th crash, a representative for World Class Driving – the company which owns the vehicle – made the following statement:
“We are not very proud of the fact that Fabio wrecked our car.”
Dude, you don’t say.
